Yesterday, on Mastodon, I was startled to see myself tagged in a ‘toot’ from Gregory Hays, the estimable UVA professor whose translation of the Marcus Aurelius Meditations I prefer. It said:

Wait, what? When I went to check, it seems he had asked whether a cocktail existed called the Indictment. A friend replied that he hadn’t been able to find one, but had a witty list of existing alternates:

All of which are witty indeed!

I answered that I would tackle the problem, wondering whether the cocktail needed to be bitter and dark or sweet sweet schadenfreude, and after only a little thought on a Friday afternoon, I thought, why not both:

The Sweet Sweet Schadenfreude (or, The Indictment)

First of all, it should clearly be a Manhattan in a nod to the present indictment, and let’s add to that a praline liqueur both as a sweetener and as a nod to a possible future indictment, let’s say in Atlanta. A dash of black walnut bitters and a square of bourbon dark chocolate on the side pairs well as the dark and bitter theme, and we have a tasty tasty refreshment with which to end the week.

For extra cheekiness, let’s serve it in an Art Deco Nick & Nora glass with a naked lady stem.

Enjoy!

• 2 oz rye
• .75 oz sweet vermouth
• .25 oz praline liqueur
• 2–3 dashes black walnut bitters
• optional dark chocolate on the side