Heavens. One has to love a column which contains the sentence, “For example, most of the candy sold during this season has been dedicated and prayed over by witches.” It’s just so adorable. You can read it here.
You will notice that this is a cached version. By the time I had read the snarky summary at Huffington Post and decided that I would brave the original, Christian Broadcasting Network had taken it down. You would think such a devout organization would have firmer principles.
Shakespeare, as usual, gives us the exact phrase for this kind of thinking: “so excellently ignorant.” This woman has absolutely no evidentiary structure on which to base her world-view other than her belief in her own fictive lenses. Notice I do not say faith. This is not faith, it is narrative.
I can just imagine the firefight that broke out when this got “reprinted” at CBN. While many of CBN’s readers probably agree with her that Halloween is of the devil, I would bet about half of them looked askance at her hysterically ahistorical take on Harvest Home.
This is the kind of mindset with which it is useless to argue: the jargon, the fictive structure, the blinkered dichotomous worldview—this is a person who has settled into a dopamine fix which rewards the thrills most of us feel when we’re seven years old and nestling in a cardboard box while the monsters roam the backyard around us. This author wouldn’t even understand anything I have just said. She is a Flatlander, and any sphere who approaches her will be greeted by shrieks of “She’s a witch!”
Bless her heart.